2015/10/17
Jacksonville (DP) – There was some uneasiness being felt by Puma as we
strode towards the other players at Springfield DGC. This reporter had
not seen Puma this nervous in a long time. Puma had forgotten to pack his
disc golf bag and therefore didn’t have his favorite discs including and
probably most importantly, his Magnet putter. He was going to have to
play with brand new, but un-tested drivers, an equally new approach disc and a
Dart putter borrowed from Simon “Boom-Boom” Bouma. "It was strange",
Puma commented, "that the putter looked to have been chewed by a dog",
very strange considering Simon doesn’t have a dog! Maybe he was playing at
Ed Austin Park and a dog got it. Unlikely, but the alternatives were that Simon
either deliberately sabotaged it or *gasp* chewed it himself. Both
options were equally disturbing. However, Puma was used to adversity and
always came through.
Puma was also acutely aware of the probable trap being laid for him.
Rick “Walkabout” Pike started his nefarious plot the night before –
tricking Puma into going to a loud whisky bar and trying to get Puma
drunk. Walkabout didn’t stop there. He was aware of Puma’s suave
nature and didn’t want to leave things to fate alone. Walkabout had
managed to get Puma’s daughter, Sweet Randi under his spell. Scheming,
Walkabout knew that there was the possibility that Puma would take care of
himself and not drink too much, as to not corrupt his astonishing skill.
Walkabout, arriving first, did the unthinkable. He bribed the waiter so
that Puma would not get a drop of food or drink, if it did not contain
alcohol. He continued his scheme after the so called meal, trying to get
Puma to go to the Oktoberfest carnival and party all night long. Puma was, of course,
smarter than the average bear and did not fall for his tricks.
The next morning, Walkabout realizing his plan had failed and not wishing
to suffer another crushing defeat, pretended that he was “on-call” and
he was now buried in work. Better to be buried in work, then buried
in disc golf, thought Walkabout. He did play one last trick, trying to
get Sweet Randi to not go to disc golf with Puma, in order for Puma to
feel conflicted and troubled when Puma played. However Boom-Boom
managed to sweet talk Sweet Randi into going.
There was a large gathering of “players”, to use the term loosely,
under the rapidly warming October day. Instead of starting at the usual
0900 timeframe, Walkabout had pushed it to 10:00 hoping the warm Florida
sun would weaken Puma as noontime approached. Jason “Mighty”
McCallister had brought Udit “Bogey” Garg along. While Bogey claimed
to be playing only his second game, Puma sensed even more deception.
Randy “Family Man aka FM” Knagge brought an extensive gaggle with him
including “The General” Ethan, who had mustered his army including
“Big” Ben, newcomer “LJ’” Justin and “Playful” Preston.
Puma was given the honor of teeing off first and even with his new driver
managed to launch a reasonable drive into the fairway. The other throws
more resembled a flock of birds being startled as some throws went left,
some right, some high, some low with a few throws that were very sensible.
As they consolidated around the first basket, it became clear that Puma
was in for a rough afternoon. Boom-Boom made his putt (he’d obviously
been practicing) as did Mighty and a bit more surprisingly, Big Ben and the
more suspiciously, the one named Bogey, who also made par.
The second hole provided a bit more excitement as LJ decided to launch his
disc into the canal. As part of his scheme to make it appear accidental,
he launched it towards a high elliptical orbit only to have it land on the
other shore. As LJ jogged over the bridge to the other side, he pondered
his options, as to not make it seem so obvious with his yearning to set the disc free.
Undeterred by the first throw miscalculation, he pick up the disc and
threw it mightily skywards to successfully complete his mission with a
satisfying *SPLASH*. FM Knagge chuckled since LJ was playing with a
$3 disc he had loaned LJ. He even had the fearlessness to brag about his financial
acumen to the other participants. FM’s smug look quickly distorted when
the General informed him that the poor and now unwanted lost disc was actually
their beloved GTS disc. The others smile and then took a more conventional route to the
basket with Puma, Boom-Boom and Big Ben making pars. It was here, that
Puma sensed some danger as Boom-Boom was actually making his putts. Luckily,
Big Ben missed the first of his many birdie putts while Mighty Jason and
Bogey made their first bogies of the day.
LJ continued experimenting with new throws and quickly learned that rollers might not
work for him as they do not always direct themselves towards any known
basket. LJ at least, could watch from one left side of the fairway as the rest
of the flock went towards the trees on the right side. It became
abundantly clear, to this unbiased reporter, that this would be a very
long game as throws were being scattered across the various fairways.
Starting on the 4th hole, is where LJ aka LumberJack got his moniker, as he
proceeded to go for every tree regardless of whether it was in the direction of
the basket. Surprisingly, many others started to follow his lead,
as Puma, Bogey and Mighty all launched impressive drives into the trees.
Puma quickly realized that following LJ from tree to tree would not be
conducive to a good score, rapidly came to his senses. Bogey seemed to be
ardently focused with his desire to go over the trees while Boom-Boom and Mighty
seemed to relish the additional challenge which the tress presented.
Meanwhile Big Ben was using his impressive driving skills into multiple
birdie chances. Luckily his approaches and putting had not quite caught
up to his driving skills. Sadly, however, Puma seems to catch the same
malaise and was 3 putting like crazy.
By the end of the 9th hole, Boom-Boom, who learned from Puma’s spring match,
was in the lead after having made nine straight pars! Puma had been 3 putting on
5 of the last 6 holes to fall behind. Mighty Jason, who was missing his approaches
and had bogeyed 4 of the first 6 holes but was happy to still be in the hunt. Big Ben was
also within striking distance. Puma knew he needed to re-focus and accept that
his “chewed” putter was the best he had for this match and he needed to learn
its’ idiosyncrasies. Puma threw down the gauntlet as he announced to Boom-Boom
and the others that he had spotted them a big enough lead and was “ready” to play.
This announcement seemed to rattle Boom-Boom as he proceeded to bogey (his
first) #10 and double bogey (#11). Mighty Jason however, was not rattled,
as he had started his 10 straight pars in a row streak. Boom-Boom tried
to recover and briefly appeared to do so as he birdied #12, only to bogey
the next 2. Puma’s posse made an appearance and Puma seems to draw
strength from this as he par’d 7 of the next 8 holes. Boom-Boom’s
peeps, a gaggle of Canadian geese, appeared on #15, and he seemed to
collect himself with them around as he made a difficult par. Sensing
Boob-Boom’s recovery, Mighty and Puma sent Playful Preston ahead on #16
to chase the geese away. This had the desired effect as Boom-Boom bogeyed the
next 2 holes.
With another par on #17, Puma realized that he was tied with Boom-Boom and
only 1 shot behind Mighty Jason. As they strode to the long-ish #18, Puma
realized he still had a chance to salvage this round. Boom-Boom and Big
Ben unleashed huge drives down the right side of the fairway. Mighty
Jason stumbled a bit with an average throw and Puma launched his best
drive straight down the middle of the fairway. Mighty Jason’s second
throw was also average setting up a long par attempt. Puma misjudged the
distance he needed and set up a slightly closer but still long par putt
fraught with risk. Big Ben overshot his approach significantly, leading
to a lengthy comeback putt. Boom-Boom sensing an opportunity dropped his
approach within 3 feet of the basket. Mighty Jason missed his extensive
par putt. Puma understanding the situation, steeled himself and sent his
hopeful game saving par attempt towards the basket. The disc hit the
chains and fell … out. In the end, Boom-Boom and Mighty Jason finished
with a score of 60. Puma at 61, Big Ben at 64, the General at
69, Bogey at 72, FM finished with a 76 and LJ at 84.

Nice writing... whoever is this mild manner reporter, they do a great job.
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